talking
/ˈtɔːkɪŋ/
Very CommonThe pre-dating phase where two people are getting to know each other romantically but are not official yet.
Frequently contested. 'We're just talking' is often used to downplay romantic interest. The ambiguity is the whole point. Some people use it to avoid commitment.
Real-world examples5 examples
| # | Example | What it means | Source |
|---|---|---|---|
| 01 | we're talking rn so idk what to call him, not my boyfriend yet | Explaining that there is romantic interest but no official label. | tiktok, 2024 |
| 02 | I hate the talking stage so much. can we just date or not | Expressing frustration with the ambiguity of the pre-dating period. | x, 2023 |
| 03 | bro said we were just talking and then went on a date with someone else the next day | Being in the 'talking' phase does not mean exclusivity. | reddit, 2024 |
| 04 | the talking stage is where most people lose me honestly | The speaker finds the early ambiguous phase of dating to be where interest usually fades. | x, 2024 |
| 05 | we been talking for like two months and he still won't call me his girlfriend | Frustrated that a prolonged talking phase has not led to commitment. | tiktok, 2023 |
Use it when
- Two people are clearly interested in each other but have not defined the relationship.
- Describing an early romantic stage before anyone has committed.
- Answering 'are you two dating?' when the answer is not exactly yes.
Do not use it when
- They are in an actual committed relationship.Use “dating” instead.
- They are literally just friends who text.
- There has been no romantic interest expressed.
Variations and related forms
Talking vs situationship
talking
Talking is an early phase, typically recent and without much established history.
VS
situationship
Situationship has usually been going on longer and involves more emotional entanglement.
Origin and context
Repurposing of the ordinary word 'talking' to describe a romantic pre-relationship phase. Widespread in Black American vernacular before entering mainstream Gen Z internet slang.
- First seen
- 2010s
- Confidence
- medium
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https://slang.fyi/talkingUpdated: 2026-08-28License: CC BY 4.0