am i the asshole
/æm aɪ ðə ˈæshoʊl/
Very CommonA Reddit community and post format where people describe a conflict and ask strangers whether they were in the wrong.
Frequently used ironically. Real posts are often framed to make the poster look good. The community has become as famous for meta-commentary as for actual moral verdicts.
Real-world examples4 examples
| # | Example | What it means | Source |
|---|---|---|---|
| 01 | AITA for not wanting to split the bill evenly when i ordered less | Asking for a verdict on a minor social conflict about money. | reddit, 2023 |
| 02 | my coworker situation is giving full am i the asshole vibes | The workplace conflict is dramatic enough to belong on Reddit. | x, 2024 |
| 03 | YTA and so is everyone in your family honestly | Delivering a verdict that spreads blame across multiple parties. | reddit, 2023 |
| 04 | the way she told the story is 100% written to make herself look good. NTA posts always do this | Skepticism that AITA posters present a biased account to get the verdict they want. | reddit, 2024 |
Use it when
- Describing a post or format from r/AITA.
- Asking friends to weigh in on a conflict you had.
- Joking that a situation is so ridiculous it belongs on AITA.
- Seeking moral validation for something you probably already know was wrong.
Do not use it when
- You want a serious discussion about ethics or responsibility.
- The conflict is too personal or serious for internet strangers to judge.
Variations and related forms
Origin and context
r/AmItheAsshole was created in 2013 and grew into one of Reddit's largest communities. The abbreviations and verdict system became their own dialect of internet conflict resolution.
- First seen
- 2013
- Confidence
- high
Cite this page
Use this stable URL to reference the entry.
https://slang.fyi/am-i-the-assholeUpdated: 2026-08-28License: CC BY 4.0